I had a friend who once told me that because of her dad's habits in childhood, she'd always get a positive, warm and fuzzy feeling from smelling beer on a man's breath. And sure enough, she ended up partnered with a beer-drinker and in fact drank a lot herself. For entirely coincidental reasons I had years ago decided I didn't want my children to smell alcohol on my breath night after night as I kiss them to sleep. Alcohol riddles my childhood; I don't want to be a slave to or obsessed with the eradication of it in my life, but until I sort all that out I really don't want my children to either.

But lest you think this was a long, meandering post about my triumph over alcoholic tendencies, you're wrong. Because this is about what my children likely associate with Love-Mommy, and what Nels just commented on this morning when he told me my breath smelled good: Coffee. I like coffee. I drink coffee. CoffeeCoffeeCoffee. I'm sick, slavish to it. I could probably not go a roadtrip without it unless it was after 6 PM or so (when I'm ready to be done drinking it for the night). You know how smokers need that smoke break? I'm almost like that with coffee. I think about coffee. I treat myself to coffee. OK, I'm not a total fiend: I won't drink "bad" coffee - I won't bother with something from 7-11 or most diners. Living in Washington state though, it's easy to find good (or at least decent) cup of the stuff.

This morning Nels snuggles me a bit before I stick him in bed next to his sister; their fresh pancakes await in a warm oven, and in a moment I'm off to bath, breakfast, and a bit of yoga before the day truly begins.

I watched The Dark Knight last night. It was a great film and I plan to see it again. I put a film review up on a site I write for (hee hee, not linking to it, it's a secret) and in looking up some details of the film on on imdb I see a post: "Who else found the Joker sexy?" Yeah, OK, it needs to be said: the Joker was sexy (and scary. Those things can go together, you know). And this is why - he was extremely self-validated. Probably the biggest turn-on, ever. Well, for me at least.

Labels: childhood, coffee, film, FOO