My mom invited us over for dinner tonight: meatloaf. Frankly, I’m dying for a break from cooking (altho’ I won’t be eating the meat, natch). Here were the negotiations:
Me: “Are there going to be mashed potatoes?” (I love my mom’s mashed potatoes)
My mom: “OK. What about vegetables *? What does Ralph like?”
My dad: “How about carrots?”
My mom: “I know what you like. I’m trying to find out what he likes.”
Me: “He likes caesar salad – I have a great dressing recipe I can mail you.”
My mom: “Good idea! I have a head of romaine. I’ll find anchovies for the dressing.”
My dad: [ unintelligible muttering because he hates salad ]
Me: “What was that?”
My dad (sullen): “I didn’t say a fucking thing.”
* My mom’s cooking requirements per dinner: meat, one “starch”, one veggie.