Friday links, and I’m owning it!
1. This weekend we watched Trail of the Screaming Forehead courtesy of sundancenow.com, a project by Larry Blamire (who also helmed one of our family-favorites, The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra). It was so much fun – so funny, clever, silly – and beautiful color (it was filmed in CRANIASCOPE). Truly a treat! The children laughed at the jokes but also took the “tension” very seriously!
2. At Underbellie: I published my piece for the Squat! Birth Journal. I encourage you to buy a copy (print or download). It’s a lovely zine by passionate people!
3. I was very impressed with “Amiâ€™s Guide to Food Privilege: How classism, fatphobia, and various other â€œ-ismsâ€ control what we eat”. Such a great 101 for the classist and orthorexic bile I am sad to say, I hear often enough – maybe even daily.
4. Join the “I LOVE MY BUM” Campaign! at The Discourse. AU Dr. Thomas continues to prove her awesomeness. I think I got firsties when I sent in my email, too. Hee.
5. “Guest Post: Transmisogyny is Misogyny Against All Women”; another one to sink your teeth into, featured at TranArchism.
6. Laurie Couture writes, in her typical direct and passionate manner, “Unschooling Parents (Not School Teachers) Best Equipped By Nature to Guide Learning”. As a friend at lunch said yesterday, she thinks parents truly aren’t aware there are options besides school or at-home-school. You know… as an aside, I would hope any of my work encourages parents to find ways to be with their children and live life well. I know I’ve made a difference – and I have people like Laurie and Wendy and Idzie and Cheyenne and Jeff and Daniel, to name a few, who’ve helped me find my own way.
7. Did y’all catch the title of the last Friday link post? [ tumbleweed blows past ] Anyway, 17 year old Fiona at Rachel Simmons’ site writes the first thing on the “Rebecca Black phenomena” I’ve seen so far that was worth reading. You know what’s pretty pathetic? Full-grown people making fun of thirteen year olds (yeah, this is happening. LOTS). And saying stuff like, “I’m going to ass-rape you” and “die in a fire” (but you know, it’s just a joke! And so are all those other instances of child abuse and terror, and actual thirteen year olds that get raped! All jokes! Um… er…). Yes. That is actually happening.
8. On a lighter note, and at The Retroist: “Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom Memories”. As I commented, I have a special place in my heart for this film; likely primarily because I saw it as a young child. Interesting it is one of two films responsible for the PG-13 rating. Also from the Retroist: Patrick Warburton for Bugle Boy. Look, PW is a handsome guy, and that’s a very nice bod he’s sporting there outside of blue latex and all. But the soprano sax and the come-hither-I’m-dressed-in-your-shirt-teehee!, not so much.
9. “Study: 87 Percent Of Movies Would Be Better With Michael Keaton In Them”. So true!
10. While I’m excited as anyone at the so-called trend Penelope Trunk identifies in Sara McGrath’s piece, “Entrepreneur with Asperger’s on getting unschooled” (I say “so-called trend” because of course, school is the relatively new invention, not “unschooling”), I didn’t like the tone of some of her comments. Specifically: “Over the next ten years, Trunk predicts that we’ll have two classes of kids: one set who knows how to run themselves in this world and another set who needs to be told what to do.” Hissss! While I have absolutely seen many differences observable in self-direction, independence, assertion, fairness, anti-bully mindset, varied and complex social skills, and real-life skills observable in non-schooled while well-nurtured children (not just in my own children but in reading countless testimonies of other life learning / consensual living / unschooled families, children, and grown non-schoolers), I think ultimately framing parenting and childrearing in competitive terms is both a very schooly thing to do and quite unhelpful – but, unfortunately, as American as deep-friend asshattery. In this country, raising your own children without the use of state institutional instruction/care is damned rare, and I’m wondering if the few and the brave who do it might consider distancing themselves from or even denouncing outright too much Special Snowflake MY KID WILL HAVE AN EDGE OVER ALL OTHER KIDS. Caveat: in exploring the amazing multilayered awesomeness that is life without school and non-punitive parenting, it’s been like scales falling from my eyes daily and a lovely journey. I think any amount of talking about one’s experience of this Wonderfulness is going to necessarily bring to light some of the silliness or awfulness of the live lived before, and I’m aware that be threatening for some to read. It’s a conundrum I haven’t quite figured out myself (for my part I try, when talking about our homelife, to speak in first person). I’d also point out many passionate life learners are very concerned with improving outcomes and scenarios for all children, including the 98% enrolled in compulsory schooling, and have some of the most incredible ideas about how to go about these goals.
11. Film: live-action akira adaptation: starring white people! at Angry Asian Man. This film is a classic, much beloved, and Hollywood won’t do well by it. The typical racebending aspect is just another soggy slap in the face. SMH as per usual.
12. Speaking of movies: I’m loving Anita Sarkeesian’s vlogs times one hundred. In “Tropes vs. Women: #1 The Manic Pixie Dream Girl” she does not disappoint. But you know, Portman’s character in Garden State *totally* had her own story arc. Like how she was epileptic, and her hamster died that one time.
13. Movies, again: screen giant and philanthropist and lovely woman Elizabeth Taylor dies. A lovely photo-perspective at all things amazing.
14. Bri writes a wonderful post on her experiences with a lap band. You know, that surgery that is rather dangerous and doesn’t work, but people are still quite eager about.
15. In ridiculous and gratuitous cupcake awesomeness, I submit the Cupcake Cupcake Topper and homemade Hostess cupcake cake balls (as seen on my blog yesterday).
16. Wednesday night we saw Handsome Little Devils at the college (they were fabulous!); Monday it’s the Reptile Man’s Serpentarium, and a few weeks later, the Kenya Safari Acrobats. I can speak highly of the first two experiences and I look forward to the third; what are you up to?
17. Currently listening to: Vetiver, Au Pairs, Adele’s “21”, and Kelis (Phoenix loves the latter two). What are you listening to?
18. Live bunnycam featuring new babies. LIVE BUNNYCAM FEATURING NEW BABIES. There is no better link to leave you with, people. P.S. a baby rabbit is called a “kitten” or a “kit”. Excuse me while I punch myself in the face. Because of the cuteness.
Kelly, just had to tell you that (when I get the chance to do so) I really enjoy perusing your Friday links. It’s so nice to sit and sip my coffee and read all your collected suggestions. In this group, I especially loved the last link in #10, about homeschoolers concerning ourselves with all children — really spoke to me and my interest in public education, despite not being a part of that system.
Anyway, just wanted to thank you for the work you put into collecting all these links. As for what we’re listening to — we tend to be all over the place, but currently loving Mumford & Sons, good ol’ Neil Diamond, and the kids are especially loving Harry Nilsson (with special emphasis on “Put The Lime In The Coconut”). As for what we’re up to — enjoying some actual SUN. We also recently saw a performance of “Go Dog Go” at Seattle Children’s Theatre (which was fantastic) and have a Seattle Men’s Chorus concert in our not-too-distant future. Also looking forward to exploration of a couple new parks in our area and planning some of our gazillion upcoming camping trips — we are camping nuts.
Just got addicted to electro-swing (ala my favorite barista). Here you will find the Caravan Palace I can’t stop listening to this week:
I love reading your links, too. In fact, I love reading all you write or recommend.
We’re struggling with “what to do with Ella” this fall. I take all your unschooling posts very seriously. Thank you for sharing your experience.
I’m so glad you like reading the links. I try to balance them out and provide a palette for any reader, but I think they end up reflecting my current interests a lot and can seem a bit myopic. Hey, I don’t know Mumford and Sons. But I prefer Tom Jones over Neil Diamond. Hee.
Thanks for the music links! We queued up Caravan Palace on Rhapsody. Thank you!
Thank you, so much! I appreciate that I can share life learning/unschooling and my schooling friends find it helpful or at least interesting! As for “what to do with Ella”, you can always ship her here. Phoenie & Nels would love that!
Wow, you outdid yourself with this collection! (Or maybe I’m just sayin’ that ’cause I like ’em a lot.) Thanks.
If it works- I’m listening to this chill-out world music station on Pandora: http://broadcaster.pandora.com/t?r=927&c=901946&l=37961&ctl=2313A19:F546F77C80D1E52E9A2C464F77954F7B050542759970026E&
Also, have you checked out http://somafm.com ?
I like the Space Station and Secret Agent stuff, but the Drone Zone completely got me through my last year of college, when I couldn’t turn off the internal chatter and concentrate on all those papers I had to research and write.
Kelly, Mumford & Sons:
After reading your piece for Squat! I have to tell you that I saw a woman nursing her baby in the bathroom at the mall yesterday. Granted, she wasn’t sitting on the toilet, but rather standing up next to the changing area (a built-in thingy on the counter, with a mattress/cushion of sorts that makes it higher than waist-level), using the mattress to rest her arms on as she stood there and nursed the baby.
I don’t know about you but at a certain point my kids all got too heavy to hold in a good nursing position while I stood if I didn’t have a sling or a wrap with me. So I smiled at her and said “My arms always got too tired to stand and nurse. Nordstrom has an awesome room by their bathroom with chairs that you can nurse in.” She said, “I know.” and I said something like “Cool.” I don’t know if she thought I was trying to get her out of my sight ( I certainly wasn’t) but I’m not sure how she took it. And here’s the thing – I’ve mentioned to nursing moms before that they don’t have to nurse in the bathroom when I see them there, that it’s not against the law to nurse in public, and have been given nasty looks/replies. So I wonder if those women are just so tired – both physically and mentally – from having to deal with those who aren’t supportive of them -that they don’t recognize that I’m on their side. Personally, I’ll whip out the boob to nurse anywhere, but I know some women don’t want to, and I respect their decision. But I still don’t want them to feel like second-class citizens who are relegated to the bathroom.
And props to Nordstrom at that mall because they changed what was obviously a “lounge” (aka – smoking room; they used to have those in bathrooms at big-name department stores) and made it into a room for moms, complete with a couch and 2 big comfy chairs, room for several strollers to be without being in the way and a counter big enough for 2 people to change their babies on at the same time, complete with sink. I discovered it by accident when I had to take Gwyn to the restroom once, and its quiet is all-encompassing, which makes it very easy to relax and have a good pause for nursing. Meanwhile the bathroom where I saw the woman nursing is noisy, crowded, just off the food court and pretty much the least relaxing place you could think of. When Tallon was nursing I made a point of using the Nordstrom room because I wanted the employees to know that people were using it and would make sure that it didn’t get repurposed as something else. That and Gwyn could sit down on the floor and play there because it was carpeted – another bonus.
good list of links, again! i put your underbellie article on facebook, so more Dutch people will read it.
Re the Squat! article -Just wanted to add that there’s an interesting thread of comments for an article about a “breastfeeding” doll, in which people are going off! Seriously, there are tons of breastfeeding haters, and some of them actually think that a doll that mimics nursing will make little kids want to have sex. So if you’re interested:
One of the comments was from a young man who said that he felt that this was the reason that we see so many teen pregnancies (apparently he doesn’t know the # is going down) since the girls continue “adult behavior” they learned by playing with dolls, even though he admitted that while he played with toy guns and swords as a kid, he doesn’t continue that behavior now. Is this part of the new patriarchy that is anti-breastfeeding?
Just yesterday I saw a woman nursing her baby at the roller skating rink. I approached her and smiled and told her, “I just want you to know, I think it is wonderful you’re feeding your baby in public.” I have always said something similar, every time I see a Grays Harbor woman nursing in public and I have the time and she doesn’t look too busy. I’ve always been met with (what seem like entirely genuine) smiles. In this case we continued a conversation for a bit.
As for a woman who is trying to be discreet, covering up, closeting, in any way, I would never tell her “you don’t have to do that/hide/cover up” or in any way comment on her discretion. Maybe she’s aware of the law, maybe not, but regardless she’s making her own informed decision (as you point out). As much as I can I smile at those with young children/babies, however and wherever they’re feeding them (it’s easy to do because it’s genuine on my part). This “informed decision” bit is why I *do* give props to those who are public. This isn’t their first rodeo, and they’ve endured glares and shit many times before. I figure they could stand to know some of us are supporting them being there (I personally appreciate when people are inclusive to me and my children-in-tow). I use the phrase “feeding” because, um, that’s what it is! Breastfeeding is a political act for some, and incites wrath and squeamishness for many (like your link – more in a minute) but it IS, also, just *feeding a baby*.
The Nordstrom room sounds awesome, and I would have enjoyed such a place when my kids were wee (and I’ve seen shoppers. However (as I think some of the links on this blog have dealt with) ideally it wouldn’t be “separate but equal”, our public spaces would be designed with those who have small children and/or need a rest. In a restaurant, families with little babies would be offered a corner booth or asked what would be most comfortable for them. Just like someone with a physical disability should be asked and helped. Etc.
Thanks for your post about the breastfeeding doll. Breastfeeding is threatening to many, men and women both. They respond with LOUD NOISES, shaming anyone they can (usually women and girls), and continue to pass on the ignorance and avarice. What we need to ask ourselves is, why does the act of or discussion of breastfeeding incite so much reflexive hate within so many women and women? I have my theories, maybe I’ll write them out!
Thank you! I just tweet-shared your post about homeschooling in the Netherlands.