“i love you all the way into space”

The other night my son laughingly and briefly impersonated an activity of scientific inquiry he’d seen on a documentary about the sasquatch. I laughed so loud and spontaneously he gleefully repeated the performance, adding nuances and several more jokes. He was really funny. Phoenix joined in a few minutes later and pretty soon I was laughing so hard I almost choked.

Sometimes I forget just how much my children – and my husband – love to see me laugh. We’ve been so incredibly busy with the move and even though I am not stressing the way I would have even a year ago, I wouldn’t exactly say I’ve been thoroughly relaxed.

This afternoon, the first substantial meal I’ve made in the new kitchen (a kitchen I adore), I put together a huge batch of homemade meatballs in a rich tomato sauce for our party tomorrow. Out the window I see my mother next door, my blonde-headed son helping her build her greenhouse. They have a plan to grow a bunch of corn in our huge backyard this summer (I KNOW, CORN!, HOW ADORABLE IS THIS PLAN?!). I feel the deepest sense of satisfaction in my children and their lives, running in sturdy boots through deep green yards and chasing cats off my sewing room fabric and inventing a game called “Penny Toss”, and politely asking me to play over and over even as I frown and scrub the floor and tell them, “In a minute…”.

But, life is good. It’s odd to be in the same neighborhood I grew up in, hearing the music of the pond in my mother’s backyard, but to have my own space too full of my own colors. Tonight I asked Ralph, “Do you know how long I’ve wanted a deep blue living room?” I modified the color choice to reflect Phoenix’s favorite but it’s true, I remember the apartment in Seattle that first got me enamored.