“Mom’s popping off. Mom’s snatchin’ wigs!” my younger son yells joyfully. The kids are so disrespectful. I will say something like, “You need to finish the dishes before dad gets home,” and they will give me some backtalk while playing Splatoon 2 together. If I get irritable they laugh. They come find me and put their arms around me several times a day. They are both a couple inches taller than me. I’m depressed.
Today Nels and I drove around town trying to find him a bed frame. I’m about done turning over the charity shops and swap meets online, and ready to buy something new on credit. So we’re driving and Prince’s “Raspberry Beret” sparks off the playlist and I can feel my son listening intently. He asks me to play it again. He is processing. Those are beautiful moments with children, when you can tell they are taking something in and making it their own and if you’re not a fool you’ll be quiet and not spoil it with your own commentary.
It was a bit too windy to put out my starts – cherry tomatoes and blue lake bush beans. The beans seem to be okay after a brazen day on the deck but I fear one of my tomato plants is injured too badly to recover. I nursed each and every seed so carefully, so today I am a bit sad, having shored up the tender sprout with a little more potting mix and hoping for the best. I think we’ll also plant potatoes and tend to the strawberries (already sprouting) and I am determined to make it work this year. Inside I water my orchids, my hibiscus and lemon tree, my little aloe and spider plant and Swedish ivy and the other odds and ends I love caring for. I need more shelves! To be sure.
Tomorrow: a large fabric order, including five yardages of lovely, deeply-dyed linen. I will be happily ensconced in my studio, running upstairs to refill coffee or make a smoothie, and to take my children out on walks or pizza dates. It’s going to be heavenly.
I am grateful for a deep sleep last night and to wake up feeling rested.
I am grateful for sunshine, and black coffee, and time to myself this morning.
I am grateful for a wonderful yoga session today, and to finally “fly” in crow.
I am grateful for my bean and tomato sprouts even though I am nervous I will mess them up!
I am grateful for time with each child today. I am grateful for their happiness.
I am grateful for time with my sponsor today, asking after a difficult situation.
I am grateful for my health and safety and the health and safety of my partner and children.
I am grateful for dinner together as a family.
I am grateful for time with my partner at the end of every day, checking in with one another.
I am grateful for my son’s gentle demeanor. We babysat a child today and he is so tenderhearted and attentive.
I am grateful for a hot shower, for cozy pajamas and for a soft and awesome bed.
I am grateful for delicious sleep and to wake rested.
I am grateful for a smoothie in the morning, and hot coffee, and sunshine in my kitchen!
I am grateful for friends who text and call.
I am grateful for yoga – every day!
Today Ralph and Beeps and I drove up to Oly for errands and to try a new restaurant. We had amazing, delicious diner food and it was a super satisfying and fun surprise. Lately I have been work work work so it was good to be frivolous.
I am grateful for all the physical love I receive, from my children and my partner.
I am grateful for lots of orders right now, and for my skills in dealing with clients.
I am grateful for a coffee date with a ladyfriend.
I am grateful for a tofu mango salad for dinner!
I am grateful for snuggling and a movie with Ralph.
I am grateful for a hot shower and cozy PJs and my bed!
I had horrid sleep last night, but I was able to go back to bed and get a couple more hours in.
Beeps has a bad cold, and wants lots of snuggles and TLC. I am grateful we have a life where we can feed our children, let them have enough rest, and give them attention and seek medical care when needed.
I am grateful for volunteer work today. I made a large meal for a crowd and that felt good.
I am grateful for time with Ralph, cooking together but also walking the dog and snuggling and watching something together.
I am grateful for my kids’ friendship. They are pretty rough and tumble but they love one another and play and relate well together.
I am grateful for a gathering of women this evening. I am feeling sad right now as the pain of a breakup is still with me. I am grateful to have some women I can spend time with, faithful women in my life.
I am grateful for dinner at the table, as a family.
I am grateful for yoga today – a long practice, and a good one.
I am grateful for sunshine today – gorgeous weather!
I am grateful for a hot shower, fresh linens on the bed, and a soft bed!