relax, don’t do it – it’s friday!

Friday links, and I’m giving you a small portion of nice, soft, digestible pudding-like fare. This week’s prescription: take ‘er easy.

First, from the annals (eh) of unintentional comedy and American overconsumption:

Or, as Lizz Winstead says, “YOU: I like to poop, but would enjoy it more if it was more complicated. ME: No problem.”

Then: Wave At The Bus – 170 days of dadly awesomeness. Truly.

Fascinating: A Worldwide Day’s Worth of Food: “In their new book, What I Eat, photographer Peter Menzel and writer Faith D’Aluisio present thought-provoking portraits of individuals around the globe and the food that fuels them over the course of a single day.” P.S. “calories for this day” – SUCH a victory over typical conversations!

Children have not always dressed, or been dressed, differently than adults. Here’s just one example. Quite relevant to a submission we have for our upcoming Fiber & Textile show.

h/t Flo for posting this on FB:

You know the only thing funnier than this seven-odd minutes is the fact that as I watched I realized: I don’t think I’ve ever used, nor heard someone use, that phrase IRL. But then –

You probably just don’t get it. Do you.*

(What movies did we see here? Check out the curator’s blog post.)

And finally: thanks, Jasmine. This is kick-ass:

* I should note: besides being a great montage, at about 0:56 we’re seeing KARATE KID III which was riffed most excellently by Mike, Bill, & Kevin.

N64 = koala

’cause everyplace I look / I picture him & you

It’s Friday, babies! I’ve got such good links this time around, too!

Bridesmaids: Can Judd Apatow make a funny movie that passes the Bechdel Test? from What Tami Said. I saw Bridesmaids on Tuesday night with Jasmine and I was entertained and thoroughly impressed with this film, which is possibly the most pro-feminist piece of cinema i’ve seen in a very long time. The film is moving, engaging, and many, many times it’s pee-one’s-pants funny. Tami’s review is spot-on, although I’d recommend viewing the film first before reading about it.

Partnership doesn’t mean letting kids do whatever the hell they want! by Lyla Wolf. This post reminds me; I have had many requests to follow up on my non-punitive parenting primer, and I want to do this soon. In the meantime, Wolf’s post is solid.

Beauty May Be In Eye of Beholder But Eyes See What Culture Socializes by Mikhail Lyubansky, in response to a horrid article that was posted, then pulled, from Psychology Today (here’s a bit of coverage on that). (Oh, and if you want to read a condescending and fallacious defense, as well as the typical smoke-and-mirrors miscast of “censorship” , you can sink your teeth into this response). Wednesday one of my (very respected) tweeps Ludovic Blain posed the question: why care about Psychology Today? – and was engaged by Dr. Lyubansky (to good effect, I think). Moral of the story: TWITTER IS FUCKING AWESOME; junk science, race-baiting, and CYA splainin’ decidedly less so.

Planking Becomes The Next Big Asinine Thing To Photograph And Post Online, from JiveTurkey. But surely even as I post there’s sumpin’ new going on.

Anita Sarkeesian posts her latest: “Tropes vs. Women: #4 The Evil Demon Seductress”. As usual, Ms. Sarkeesian does not disappoint. “Evil Demon Seductress” in all forms has always given me a huge pain in the ass; glad to see it taken down point-by-point.

I know you’ve been waiting for results from the 2011 World Beard & Mustache Championships. Here they are.

Mike Rowe addresses Congress:

I haven’t seen all of “Dirty Jobs” but the more I watch the more I love the show – for many reasons – and our whole family is helplessly enamored with Mr. Rowe (of course). In his address here he mentions a period in his life where he gradually became “less interested in how things got made and more interested in how things got bought”. I think a lot of Americans are in that boat. I commend Mr. Rowe for his work.

Women in lower income brackets fearing aging prejudice seek cheap Botox, risk health. h/t friend and reader Jeanne for sharing this through Google Reader. If reading this makes even ONE person stop shaming and mocking women for so-called “vanity” behaviors (including: makeup, cosmetic surgery, body shapers/push-up bras, etc) I will be a happy li’l camper.

My Tweep Jim posted this birthday vid, which made me get teary, and smile, and almost puke, because of TEH AWESOMEZ. Love it.

Make: Taco Truck Chorizo Sopito. Oh you KNOW it’s gonna be good.

Also: basic chicken salad. After a near-lifetime eschewing mayonnaise I finally occasionally use it; gonna give this one a try.

And… I don’t own cutesy magnets, but it’s never too late to start.

Listen to: Damien Jurado: Tiny Desk Concert – or, perhaps, a Queen retrospective.

Geekigami: these ppl fold paper good

Sad news: Grease actor Jeff Conaway in coma after suspected overdose of painkillers. I didn’t much like Grease, but I did like Kenickie and Rizzo. Addiction sucks. It’s painful stuff.

An illuminating passage by Kurt Vonnegut, as showcased on Class Rage Speaks

Tweet of the week, from my seven year old son (yes, we did talk to him about his word choice).

Separated at birth?

N64 = koala

& finally: a taste of some of the goodness from my pending breakup mixtape – and:

a lovely cover of Bon Iver, courtesy of Clara C:

Take me out, baby / I want to go sail tonight :: Friday links!

Thursday I had one of the most energetic and lovely days, but now it’s 2 AM on Friday morning and I’d better get my links up!

1. Spousal unit Ralph updated his design website, favoring pink. I think it looks great!

2. From ricedaddies: “Who Loves More: Parents or Children?” This piece includes an analysis of a childhood book – a pretty funny analysis I think- and then delves into even more thoughtful territory.

3. Mexican Pointy Boots. This was seriously nine minutes of my life well-spent:

 

4. Katie Makkai – “Pretty”:

(Also, do read Tami Harris’ thoughts and the comments, at “Not a pretty girl.”)

5. From friend and reader Kat: “What Happened When I Chased Down the A**hole Who Slapped My Butt on the Street” at alternet. Good for her.

6. “A Black Woman’s Plea for ‘Justified’ – The Red State Western You Should be Watching” at Racialicious. This is super-smart commentary on American television and the typical (and atypical) treatment of race relations (specifically black/white race relations).

7. “AED Guidelines for Childhood Obestity Prevention Programs” from the Academy of Eating Disorders. This? is stunning. D’you think our First Lady will take note? I sure hope parents, teachers, and other adults do.

8. So, I’m not going to link to the deplorable article by LZ Granderson entitled, “Parents, don’t dress your girls like tramps”. I don’t want to contribute to even one blog hit, although by all means go read if you can stomach it. Ostensibly about the sexual exploitation and objectification of young girls and young women, it was also a hot mess of oppositional sexism, patriarchal attitudes, adultism, slut-shaming, sexism, victim-blaming, and misogyny (so: nothing we haven’t heard before). Yes, this was aired on CNN. A few good things came out of the piece: namely, on-point rebuttals. Here are four:

From PostBourgie: “Sexism, What About the Children?! Edition”. At Shakesville: “This is so the worst thing you’re going to read all day.” From Pigtail Pals: “Did You Just Call My Daughter A Prostitute?” And from Amy Bradstreet, a friend and reader and supporter and awesome-lady: “Shame And Blame Where It Belongs Regarding The Objectification Of Children”.

As always for complex or socially-heated subjects showcased by rather long pieces, feel free to add your comments to source articles and let me know – I will happily link back through here.

9. A Derrick Jensen quote, which I take as a refutation of “well, that’s human nature” / “it’s natural for people to act that way” of those I consider pro-status quo apologists, as posted by Idzie.

10. “Being acceptable in the eyes of society”: people would do well to read what it’s like to be a mother and/or mother-identified.

11. Make: sent to me by my brother’s lady J.: Herb Stenciled Easter Eggs. Beautiful!

11. “green snake”, a photo anthology (a tiny bit NSFW). I keep wanting to try absinthe, but I’ve thus far been too lazy to try to get ahold of some.

12. And finally: the best ballon dance I’ve seen, and that’s saying something:

Everybody’s workin’ for the weekend: Friday links

Today’s Friday links are shorter than usual; I took a media break halfway through the week (this meant, among other things, I would click over to my Google Reader, scan briefly for any of my friends’ blogposts to read – then close my eyes and click “Mark as Read” ON EVERYTHING ELSE while crying). OF COURSE I still got some great stuff for you all – never fear.

At What Tami Said: “Sexism and Saturday Night Live”. “When faced with hard discussions about sexism or racism or homophobia, etc., people are often quick to a) minimize the past and b) celebrate just how “post-ism” we are today.” Yup, you said it.

School: I mentioned this in last weeks’ broadcast: “The Worst Bullying PSA Ever”, a critique by author Rosalind Wiseman. The critique is great, of course, but what I didn’t mention last week and what I wanted to mention this week is an alternative work she cited: “School Bullying: What You Haven’t Heard”.

Regarding school – and was pretty upsetting (but not surprising) to read – from Voice In Recovery “BMI, Education & Extra Credit for Weight Loss”. The phrase “bad idea” cannot be overstated.

On the lighter side: h/t to friend and reader Jasmine, for a Monty Python classic, “Argument Clinic”…

as well as another classic: “Phonetic Punctuation”, by Victor Borge:

But here’s the video I’m hoping many people will watch. Regarding film, television, and media and the critique, analysis, and projects associated: “Geena Davis on the Effects of Gender Inequality on TV and in Movies” at Rice Daddies, featuring a 15 minutes of FANTASTIC as follows:

In the food department: on FB my lady Flo posted a recipe for Bacon Egg Pancake Cups. Let me tell you, I hate breakfast foods Times One Hundred, but the rest of the family loves them. Oh also: I will rock these the very first time I make ’em.

Ending on a transcendent note: friend and reader Medrie wrote “Fear Not”. I’ve mentioned her work many times; she is the blog I read that always has my heart in my throat. I can imagine many mothers and erstwhile children could relate to this piece.

Foxglove!

addendum

This journal is not really suited for newsbites (besides my Friday links), but I felt pretty dang happy about the conversation Tami Harris and I had last week, which she posted to her site this morning:

“Talking with…Kelly Hogaboom: Why are online conversations among women about mothering and children so contentious?”

One reason I’m feeling great about this is Tami Harris is a writer and blogger I have the utmost esteem for (based on many things but, if I had to pick a stand-out, she has an incredible ability to create and facilitate productive discussion on intensely polarizing social topics). I really appreciated getting the invite to speak with her on this subject. From other conversations I’ve had with her (usually via DM or @ on Twitter) and reading her writings, I can predict this new “Talking with…” series she’s brewing up is going to be worth reading. Tami is not a “single-issues blogger” (not that there’s anything wrong with that), which means I never know what to expect and what direction her work will take me. For example: not a handful of hours after Ralph and I posted my first broadcast, I’d decided the next installment would feature the issue of food (the production of, topical news regarding, and the cultural experiences of what we eat – and, of course, some recipes) and clicking through on her site a few minutes later I found a relevant work she’d linked to that I’m definitely going to be discussing.

Anyone moved to comment extensively on the conversation between Tami and I, as per usual I recommend doing it at the source article. If you like I am happy to link to you here!

In other news, Nels was up off and on last night crying with a fever (one very responsive to acetaminophen, which he eventually requested for his discomfort) which meant I as up off and on last night as well. Frankly, today I’m a bit wrecked. As soon as I’m offline I’m going to bundle us up for a bike ride and spend the day caring for the two of us as best I can.

From the archives: here’s a picture of Nels from early last summer, carrying a foxglove he selected for me.
Foxglove!

it’s six am and i’m all messed up (friday)

It’s Friday again and I gotta admit, this week’s links are rather schooly (or, non-schooly), but there are a few other subjects as well as some frivolity to boot. Let’s get started, shall we?

1. In “Authentic Parent, Inauthentic Birth?”, Laura shares a story of a birth that went poorly – with the typical lack of support from others, choice afforded, and semi-tortured reflection on personal consent given. It is a powerful piece and I related to much of what I read. I also thought a bit about how much I admire birth and breastfeeding – well, activists, I guess, although that word has, to some, such a rigid and harsh tone. Indeed, culturally-induced misogynistic perceptions have succeeded in bathing the birth movement in a poor light. But Laura’s post, spoken in first person and passionate and real, reminds us this movement is mostly populated by women who want others to have a safe and empowered experience – and to have choices, and the support to make them, in one of life’s potentially most profund events.

2. One of my favorite comedians, and from what I can tell an all-around beautiful man, tweets his interview: “BIll Corbett” at Suicide Girls. Besides being a must-know for any cinemaphile, it seems almost everything he says is funny, insightful, or sweet – and often enough, all three. He and Al Yankovic alone are worth joining Twitter.

3. “Kill Me Or Leave Me Alone: Street Harassment As A Public Health Issue” via Racialicious. The post is just – hard to read, and reflective of a reality far to many people face. Tangentially (sorta), like the author, as a woman, and living life with compassion as much as I can, I don’t think the mainstreem public response to Charlie Sheen’s activities (which continue to be exploited and celebrated) is fun nor funny (latest update).

4. Sunday Sweets: Butterbeer Cupcakes at amybites. Yes. I’m gonna be making these.

5. Apologies if I’ve shared this (I don’t think I have), but because the Bill Corbett interview reminded me of the many delightful MST3K and Rifftrax educational shorts I’ve seen, I present: “The Cliche Family in Television Land!”

6. Misbehavior in Public courtesy of Love & Logic. OK, let’s have a contest. If someone can find something MORE f’d up and chilling than my cited example, you win like, a prize. Here’s the worst aspect, as I see it: the impressions and instruction the physically-large sixteen year old Preston in this story receives, given the “big stick” by the authority figure (the mother), to wield over the thirteen year old at his mercy. After spending most his days and hours in school, saturated in the playground (and classroom) bully culture in play, this seems an elegant and effective training session for Preston in Might Equals Right.

7. “The Deconstruction Of Indulgence (NFSW)” at Sociological Images. These were rather upsetting images, actually, so let me post a trigger warning for eating disorder content. Well-executed art, absolutement, not arguing that. What thoughts and feelings do the pieces invoke in you?

8. “Raising children to be submissive members of the lower caste” by Tami Harris (whom I just, a few hours ago, finished an awesome blogger-on-blogger interview; she’ll be posting on Monday!). Watch the video, read the passages and comments. I was really struck by how different cultures and microcultures frame the same strategies. In my parenting peer world, parents hardly *ever* own up to hitting (or dragging, grabbing, screaming at, coercing, manipulating) their children, although time-outs are deemed completely acceptable and *totally different*/separate from the abusive framework listed above.

9. In public health: um, go Georgia? (but, not) Anti-Childhood Obesity PSA Shames Fat Children as curated at Sociological Images. As usual regarding the folk devil obesity, the comments are riddled with a few haters; but hey, there are also some purdy good rebuttals to the haters. Or maybe I was just feeling kinda unsinkable when I read through ’em. Like I got some laughs from those who said they didn’t see the “shaming” in the campaign.

10. Speaking of fats: in AU: “Should fatties pay more for flights? I’m on the Morning Show” at Dr. Samantha Thomas’ site The Discourse. OK, I’m sorry, but I’m used to examples of US morning television, with it’s false parity and sensationalism and weird superficiality even on issues torturing Americans. So, is Australian morning television always this decent? A short, but satisfying, video, and Dr. Thomas does very well.

11. Top reasons to homeschool or unschool by The Sattvic Family. Good retort to the “socialization” question regarding homeschoolers, by the way: “As is obvious, the way of choosing one’s peers regardless of age is far more social than one’s child only having friends they are forced to choose from, and that are the same age.” Also, reason 4), in its entirety, was so good it made me pee a little.

12. “Children are Born to Learn Everything They Need On Their Own” by Laurie Couture (I am currently making my way through her podcasts; brilliant!):

“No one has to (or should) teach children anything. Children are wired from birth to learn everything they need to learn to reach their full potentials. They just need adults to get out of their way and instead guide, mentor and expose children to the resources they want and need in order to explore, create, play and invent.”

13. Speaking of people to listen to: Wendy Priesnitz will be featured at Unplugged Mom, 8 AM EST today! It’s a podcast so you can download later at your discretion.

14. In the comic book genre, applicable to other pop culture products: “Tropes vs. Women: #2 Women in Refrigerators” from Anita Sarkeesian at Feminist Frequency.

15. Finally: lately I’m listening to Brandi Carlile, watching “Gavin & Stacey”, and (re-)reading The Lord Of The Rings: The Fellowship Of The Rings, a paperback I got for $1 from Jackson Street Books. Wonderful stuff. What about you?

a walk with paradise


Moss On Sidewalk

“Why do people claim all boys like the color blue, and all girls like the color pink? It isn’t true.”

My daughter is asking me. She’s holding my hand; her other is engaged in walking my mother’s dog, whom we have for the next week while his owner buries her toes in a Mexican beach somewhere. The three of us are on a walk. Kind of a long one.

I tell my daughter, now: “Well, I have an answer. It’s kind of long. Do you still want to hear it?” She tells me Yes.

I tell her, you know basically, historically, people have a tendency to oppress one another. I ask her if she knows what this means. She says Yes. We talk about this for a bit. I tell her one way people can feel justified in their worldview is to believe those oppressed are less human, or categorically separate. I say it comforts some people to make up reasons one group of human beings is innately different than the other. I tell her some more of what I’ve seen. I make sure to qualify it is not all people who do this in every regard, but that most of us have learned to do it unconsciously. She brings up her father. She tells me he is someone who does not oppress women. I tell her Yes, and No… sometimes he makes mistakes. I remember aloud when she was little(r) and he began to refuse to help her clean her body in the bath because she had a female body, even though he continued to help his son. She nods, not necessarily remembering this, but getting my point.

I tell her anyone can make mistakes.

She’s thinking about her body, and her brother’s. She says, “But we’re not that different. Just a little bit. Like how our fingerprints are unique. Like tiger stripes.”

Enlightenment. Incredible! “Do tigers have unique stripe patterns?” I ask. Miracles.

“Oh yes!” she says, brightening with the typical enthusiasm she feels for the world of fauna.

We walk for a while.

I continue, because I feel her expectation. “So, when people believe men and women are socially different in ways irrefutably tied to biology, that’s called oppositional sexism. And when people decide the traits associated with men are superior to those associated with women, that’s called androcentrism.”

She’s with me. All the way.

I say, “You know how some people value physical strength over emotional strength?”

She says Yeah.

Then she adds, “One time in the mine in the backyard, P. couldn’t pull something out of the pit, so I did it. I was strong enough to do it. After I did it he said, ‘Thanks for doing that. I tricked you, and now you’re my slave.'”

A beat. Then, I say, “That’s one hundred percent bullshit.”

“Yeah,” my daughter agrees.

My eyes sting behind my sunglasses. She is so incredible. I often can’t remember our conversations verbatim enough to log them, to write them all out just how good they are. I tell myself it is wonderful enough just to have this time with her, the real experience is now, in the moment, not later, although I am always so pleased to continue journalling.

We walk together for a while.

At her request, we stop at a nursery. While observing koi in a pond, she hears frogs in one of the greenhouses.

She catches frogs, so carefully, so swiftly. She speaks to them and when she releases them she says, “I’ll see you soon.”

Tree Frog On Taro Leaf

Phoenix Handles A Tree Frog

After the first frog she’s figured out some way to handle them where they sit, placid, in her hand.

Trust

She encourages me to hold one. I am terrified. They seem so fragile, yet so startling in their jump! She finally convinces me to hold one. It turns and regards her while I take a picture.

My Frog Experiment

The proprietor of the business joins us eventually and shares lots of helpful and interesting facts about native frogs. Then he demonstrates the grownup-typical chastisement of my daughter for being a human being while small – don’t catch the frogs, don’t step there, blah blah.

My daughter doesn’t seem to mind. So I figure I shouldn’t either.

We continue on our way, stopping at the Farmer’s Market to buy a bunch of daffodils for a sad friend, and a bird of prey coloring book for my daughter.

Then along the wet and angry river and to home.

Secret Frog

remember this moment forever, from married to the sea

get your coffee, tea, or mad dog 20/20 & settle in for Friday’s linkage

We got some awesomeness here. But seriously.

1. Jill at I Blame The Patriarchy hits it out of the park with “Toronto activists take back the slut”. She asks: can a slur be re-appropriated? What, if anything, will that solve? Also: the Sexual Assault Prevention Checklist is priceless.

2. On slur reclamation (again), coupled with artistic license: “the slants vs. u.s. patent and trademark office” as posted by Angry Asian Man. “We deserve the right to protect our name,” [Simon] Tam[, the band’s manager and bass player,] says. “In the larger sense, minorities should have the right to label themselves.” More details here.

3. Mash-up! In 1990 I was as enamored as all mid-teen girls with Roxette’s ballad “Must Have Been Love” – you know, one of those songs you try to record off the radio onto a mixtape (yes, a real mixtape) and sing along with girlfriends from the back of mom’s 1981 Mercury Cougar while being driven to Denny’s after a YMCA dance. That said, I never liked the film Pretty Woman much (but I have been known to make a few “Big mistake. Big.” jokes, usually after my debit card bounces whilst buying tampons). Anyway: FunkyBeccaBecca’s trailer re-imagining seems far more apt for this creepy so-called Cinderella story.

4. Speaking of film: Tami Harris writes “Sucker punched by Sucker Punch– Girls and guns don’t equal female empowerment”. My caveats to some of these types of article are noted in the comments. As usual, a great piece by Tami, one of my favorite social justice and pop culture bloggers.

5. Female (super)(s)heros: musings on Wonder Woman, then and now, from a girlhood fan: “Here’s hoping for a superhero every girl can aspire to” by Morven Crumlish. Crumlish pens a warm tribute to WW and the real-life WWs we’ve known and still know today.

6. From NYRA: “Taking any random childhood incident and pretending it made you successful!” What’s yours? What would yours be? I’m thinking, “I fell off my tire swing and ended up in a successful engineering career!”

7. Jasie alerts me my brother’s lady J. got Tumblr’d (J. later posted an update with the source image, which IMO all blogs/Tumblogs/etc. should do in the first place!). [ Frankenstein voice:] SO PRETTY

8. Make: sewing 101: oilcloth storage bin. Remedial-sewing-skills, expensive/designer fabric? Product = lovely, of course.

9. Reader and friend M. writes some bathtime brilliance: “French Jellyfish Icicle Party, Anyone?” After reading her ingenuity, I’m thinking anyone disinterested in baths could be persuaded to becoming a fan.

10. Tuesday Idzie asks people to weigh in with questions: I respond via email, and Idzie posits and answers: “Why is Unschooling so Fringe?” Idzie’s thoughts are on point, but in particular I enjoyed reading comments: such as Cathy who writes, “What I have seen, even in the unschooling world, is that parents don’t really ‘trust’ their children. They are often all for following the lead of their children, as long as their children follow the appropriate, known path.” Wendy Prieznitz makes a few brilliant points about the larger cultural picture. You know, all that stuff you’ll find me bitching about on a regular basis.

11. A fabulous interview regarding obesity, diet, health, and public cost: from 2009, “America’s Moral Panic Over Obesity” by Megan McArdle at The Atlantic and featuring an interview with author and statistician Paul Campos. I’m not sure how I missed it, but it’s golden.

“We’re in the midst of a moral panic over fat, which has transformed the heavier than average into folk devils, to whom all sorts of social ills are ascribed. […]

“[A]s Mary Douglas the anthropologist has pointed out, we focus on risks not on the basis of “rational” cost-benefit analysis, but because of the symbolic work focusing on those risks does – most particularly signalling disapproval of certain groups and behaviors. In this culture fatness is a metaphor for poverty, lack of self-control, and other stuff that freaks out the new Puritans all across the ideological spectrum, which is why the war on fat is so ferocious – it appeals very strongly to both the right and the left, for related if different reasons.”

You know, I kept copying and pasting quotations because it was just so good – so I finally just stuck with a couple pieces. The part about the upper West Side woman and social privilege and class… I got the chills. He owned it.

12. Natalie gives herself a zombie apocalypse manicure (using OPI Shatter which is somehow affiliated with Katy Perry but I don’t know much else because, guess what, I hardly give a fiddler’s fuck). And yeah, I got all up on eBay buying that stuff.

13. More consumerism, of a sort, via Angry Asian Man: The Morning Benders realease an EP with proceeds to Japan. This is a fabulous band and, since I “bought” the CD, I can confirm it’s a lovely listen.

14. Renee Martin posts a video; “tell us how you really feel”. Having a passionate, articulate, and strong-willed child of my own (with a retaliatory bent when things don’t go his way), I got quite a smile watching this.

15. So now “uterus” is a bad word. Fair points regarding deregulation and Republicans’ selective “big government” platform. But as for the author of this piece – I note liberals luuuurrrve to mock the GOP – in this case their “prudery”. Too bad misogyny is an American value that truly reaches across the aisle.

16. In the kitchen: Kung Pao Shrimp? HELL YES

17. Not Back To School Camp: WANT. For my daughter. No seriously, she wants to go to camp, but not the typical camps offered – specifically, an unschooling / life learning camp. I’m on the lookout. Any help or advice would be appreciated!

18. Ohmygoodness! How I love it when this happens. A reader tweeted me to say she enjoyed last week’s link to Anita Sarkeesian’s vlog “Tropes vs. Women: #1 The Manic Pixie Dream Girl”. She also wrote her own piece, “confessions of a recovering manic pixie dream girl”. Inspired, I dug up and (re-)published my piece on the Will Ferrell/Man-Boy movies: “film feministe: the cinematic man-child and his perpetual harem of willing, nubile females”. Good stuff!

19. Last week a young Egyptian cobra escaped the Bronx Zoo. I kept up on it thru Twitter. / She’s since been recaptured. / Or has she?

20. The Hogakidlets were featured as the Gratuitous Cute Kid Pic last week at Love Isn’t Enough. By the way, I’m dying to write for this blog again. Because of all the awesomeness (at the blog, not necessarily in my writing).

21. Appropos, as my husband did injure his back this last week. Unfortunately, we weren’t having a Montclair moment on the beach or otherwise at the time it happened.

remember this moment forever, from married to the sea

Have a lovely weekend!

"What the fuck are you Tolkien about?"

friday, friday, gettin’ down on friday

Friday links, or also, things I tweet and email to friends/family and then notice these people post them to Facebook to madcap happy responses. I miss the days of my Facebook account. I had many fans. Am I tempted to go back? Narp.

1. At design-fetish, from two years ago: “Retrofied Modern Movie Posters”. I sent these to my husband – a local and volunteer poster-designer, who wrote me in return (smugly), “I know.” Whatevs. A couple days later I stumbled (in a totally different space) on another such concept – but hello, a poster with major spoilers? Oh hell no.

2. I have one quibble with the self identified “world’s 9 most brilliantly pointless street fliers” curated at someecards. The “pointless” should be replaced with “fucking awesome!” because I peed a little. The last example had me at Hello.

3. I recently stumbled on the Antonio Buehler article “Who SHOULD Homeschool?”. I’m quite impressed as it is pretty frank and hard-hitting while emphatically laying to rest many myths propagated and ignorance perpetrated about the homeschooling option. Probably other people aren’t that impressed, but for me, he tackles a discussion many people pussyfoot around. On that note, I’d advise not clicking through unless you can read with an open mind, and as per usual if you have a refution or comment, please do leave it at the source material and link back through comments here if you like.

4. At the same time and in a similar vein, I found Buehler’s previously-published article, “Who Should NOT Homeschool” to be, as far as I’m concerned, compassionate and realistic in many ways… although I am a bit confused and have some concerns I haven’t satisfied. Beuhler seems to advocate for homeschooling purely in terms of achievement (which is a schema also embraced, however poorly consummated, by the schooling model). I’m wondering what worldview he holds for those who’d homeschool for holistic reasons, personal empowerment, and the mental, emotional, and physical health of our little human beings – regardless of the status, titles, or pay they end up commanding in their adult state.

5. Anita Sarkeesian challenges the mainstream tendency to celebrate so-called “feminist” film roles in this vlog: “True Grit, Mattie Ross and Feminism?”. There’s nothing I can say here that will add to Sarkeesian’s excellent analysis; the six plus minutes are well-spent. If you don’t know the term androcentrism, it’s long-past time you remedied that.

6. The Boston Globe “The Big Picture” feature contains a photo-essay of the earthquake/tsunami/nuclear disaster in Japan. The images of the very old and the very young are especially difficult for me. I also find myself wondering about the experiences of the rescue workers. They are faced with such colossal devastation, yet every moment they are making a positive difference – saving lives and moving people to tears and prayer.

7. At The Noble Savage, Amity Reed writes “Sleep, my pretty, sleep”, regarding a strategy to perserve mental health when the world seems a dark and scary place.

8. At What Tami Said: “Stop Being ‘Shocked’ by ‘Isms'”. I’ve heard this point before, and I am in whole-hearted agreement. I love how Tami writes because she is rational yet well-equipped to discuss emotional realities; she also has a succinct delivery on complex subjects that I rather envy. And good lord, any “progressive” or liberal reading here, please do click through.

9. Crafting: I’m pretty sure the Super Secret Waffle Cult is behind many nefarious breakfast pastry plots. And by the way, I would totally make up some of these crepe paper flowers except that within a week they’d be clotted with cat hair; no longer so “fresh”.

10. Sasson shirts. I don’t need to write any further, except to say this is what I like to put on after I’ve had a hard day bringing much love, happiness, and saxiness to the world.

11. The tribute to Dwayne McDuffie at Racialicious is sweet and informative. In particular I enjoyed the video interview where McDuffie makes some excellent points regarding the inclusion of racial minority characters in a white-dominated field. It is So. Worth. Watching!

12. Sent to me by friend and reader Bex: “Deb Roy: The Birth of a Word”. At 4:57 I STARTED CRYING. Also at the end. The big ticket/mass media/marketing opportunity items were less important to me than the reflection of the “feedback loop” of raising our young – in other words, it isn’t just us influencing them; we respond in Pavlovian kind.

13. Random Parenting Thought 2 – Behaviourism v Unconditional Parenting at Analytical Armadillo. I would cite Behaviorism as just about the number one mainstream US parenting principle (even if adherents, parents and non-parenting adults alike, wouldn’t self-identify it as such). It’s crap, and limited, and fear-based – and yet it prevails. Ed. note, see comments for a discussion of the meaning of “Behaviorism”.

14. Local! “Nirvana’s Kurt Cobain memorialized with guitar sculpture in Washington” (that would be Aberdeen, Washington) from APP.com (written by local reporter Steven Friederich). I notice Mayor Bill Simpson can’t help farting in the general direction (most locals with his views on Cobain however think our log/rape’n’pillage history and serial killer/boomtown murder rate are totally honorable/colorful and deserve the museums & memorabilia devoted to them. Etc.). What’s interesting to me is people still come from all over the world to explore Kurt Cobain’s life, to find clues, to look deeper into the birthplace of music that resonates with them. On a related note, Aberdeen and surrounding area has mostly whizzed this responsibility (and opportunity) down the leg, although as this newspiece indicates, many people are trying to do right by our historical record.

15. Guest-posting at Authentic Parenting, Meredeth Barth writes, “Just a Child”, her response to an average parenting mag’s average kind of article (“25 Manners Kids Should Know”). Of course I related to much of this, but today I’m reflecting that mainstream “experts” often aren’t really experts, but rather those who repeat and reify the views we’re finding comforting, convenient, etc. Most parenting “experts” today espouse a lot of twaddle (sadly, some of it quite harmful), and I’m sad to think of how much I’ve bought into, and how hard it continues to be to un-learn these tenets and simultaneously forge better relationships.

16. Awful Library Books discussed a potential shelving of Not in Room 204, a children’s book dealing with a child’s experience of sexual abuse by a father. The original post (specifically the submitter’s concerns) and many comments made me incredibly sad, or angry – some comments made little jests, some claimed the book was “too creepy” for children to handle and it might give them nightmares (ah yes, the perpetuated belief kids aren’t smart/are too fragile, etc. – while we hold they are, apparently, equipped to handle being abused in their homes without a lifeline). Fortunately better heads pervailed in the commentariat. I liked what Sarah, a librarian, had to say (3/17/11 4:54 PM): “This book handles the subject responsibly and respectfully. It’s crucial that we don’t hide information from kids even if it makes us uncomfortable; sometimes their lives depend on getting their hands on a book like this.” Leigha (3/17/11 10:56 PM) makes a great point about a handful of responses regarding access: “All the comments about how it’s a good book to have because it’s in the adult section anyway and the kid would need it read to them seem to be missing one key point…it’s normally (like for the girl in the book) one of the parents DOING the molesting. Do you really think a child molester is going to read this book to their kid? And I doubt anyone else would unless they suspected something. If it’s not where the kids themselves can get it, it’s pretty much worthless.” Me, I’m still saddened, and gobsmacked, that one of the most prevalent forms of abuse against children, and one the child is least able to get help for, is still so under-discussed and meets with so many so-called well-intentioned adults’ pressure to keep it under wraps.

17. Tonight the 7th Street Theatre here in Hoquiam is showing Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring. As I have been doing for about four years, I designed the movie program (shoehorning in the popular trivia section, and deciding which trivia had merit, and imagining some the fantasy-geek rage I might inspire if I got any of it wrong). Anyway, whilst up late finishing that up I stumbled on this image which left me giggling.

"What the fuck are you Tolkien about?"

For those whom it applies, I hope you have a lovely Friday night and a fabulous weekend!